I am coming home somehow soon

One of the things I’ve really grown to love about Uganda is the little phrases that people use. For example:
-Somehow is synonymous with somewhat. "My house is somehow near the big mango tree." "I am feeling somehow sick."
-During the first week, the doctor who came to talk to us about safety spoke of avoiding “the murder by WHAAAAT? The murder by shooting”
-Sorry is used as both “I apologize” and “I feel sorry for you” so any time you trip, cough, or have any small inconvenience, you get a surrounding chorus of “soddy soddy soddy”
-Yesterday we went out for dinner and when I asked for something on the menu I was told “it is missing.” As in, they have run out of it or never had it.
-In the US, when you ask people how they are, there are usually not long responses but they vary a little. Here, I have yet to hear any reply other than “Iyamfine” to “how are you?” I once said “I’m doing pretty well” and got a very confused look.
-When anything happens that disrupts common procedure, they explain that the problem “disorganized us”
-When referring to the general population or a large group of people, they are called the “general happiness”
-Whenever you attend a lecture, training, or speech, you can expect to hear “Ah we togethah?” at least once every 3 minutes
- If you go to the market and ask “do you have beans?” There is no other possible response besides “they ah there” or “they ah not there.” The phrase is actually appropriate in a surprising number of contexts.
-“It is ok” always replaces “yes” or any other positive response.
-“Ok please” “thank you please”. Not much of an explanation for this.
-Often, when you leave a store or someone's mud hut, instead of a goodbye that I am used to, they often say “ok. Nice time.”
-Finally, it’s pretty common for people to say things that clearly do not make sense. I’ve actually found this to be advantageous because if I don’t have a good answer to something, I just say whatever comes to my mind and nobody questions me if my response does not actually relate whatsoever to what the question was.

So I guess I should start out by saying soddy soddy soddy for the incredibly long time I’ve gone without keeping you updated. I have to keep a journal for my practicum and once I write in that every day I’m pretty ready to do something else other than reflect on the day. Also, the past few weeks have been pretty uneventful. Mostly just wake up, go to work, try to conduct some interviews but mostly just sit and observe, come home, make dinner, and then go to sleep. Anyways, here some highlights from the past few weeks. In order to make it more upbeat, I will try to alternate happy things with sad things.

-Happy: We attempted to go to Murchison Falls to see giraffes, lions, and other animals we’ve only ever seen in zoos, but it turns out Uganda realized that all tourists have absurd amounts of money they are willing to spend, and since we are all college students that still depend on the ‘rents for money, we opted for a slightly cheaper plan of doing research all weekend and then sleeping in our own beds instead. We briefly discussed trying to bribe our way into Sudan, but as the election results started coming back we quickly realized that was the worst idea ever. Ooh, and I also got like 4 more dresses made that I designed and then picked out the fabric for. Lots of fun! Glad I ended up getting a little more time in Gulu though. I’m really going to miss it here. I’m thinking if I can’t find a job when I graduate maybe I’ll come back and volunteer for a little while.
-Sad: Last night one of the girls I live with got really sick in the middle of the night. It took her half an hour to find a ride to the hospital and then when she got there, they didn’t have a lab technician on staff. This is yet another reason why I have a newfound appreciation for the American medical system.
-Happy: We have become pretty good friends with the guys who own the bar down the street from us. They have a trivia night every Thursday and last Thursday they let me and one of my friends make up the trivia questions and then announce them. Sooooo much fun!
-Sad: My research overall has made me pretty upset with the state of the world. For example, I discovered the most fantastic catch 22 ever: Around 50% of women in this area brew alcohol because it is their best way to make an income, yet women whose husbands often get drunk often (20%) are 50% more likely to report domestic abuse than other married women.
-Happy: I have become quite a resourceful chef on our one kerosene burner, lack of oven, lack of microwave, lack of refrigerator, spotty at best water supply, and frequent cooking by headlamp. For example, a few days ago we made PIZZA on the stovetop with chapatti crust (rolled using a glass bottle), sliced tomatoes instead of sauce, and cheese made in a cave that we bought from a doctor (who spent years studying in France, and smokes like a chimney) turned cheese man. Also, I am taking advantage of 25 cent avocados and have perfectly the art of guacamole. Also last night we made refried beans. From scratch. Do you have ANY idea how long it takes to cook dry beans? All day.
-Sad: A Ugandan friend of one of the girls I live with (who I had met a few times) passed away a few days ago. We were told he had some sort of lung issue, but from what we’ve heard I have almost no doubt that had he been at any hospital in the US he would have been fine. The custom here is that when somebody dies in the hospital, you transport them back home for the burial. Since the hospital’s one ambulance was nowhere to be found, it came down to his friends to hire a car and do the actual manual transporting of his body.
-Happy: The girls where I work take vocational classes, one of which is salon. As a result, I have spent the past 2 weeks with my hair in approximately 50000000 teeny tiny braids with woven in extensions, which took 4 girls 3 hours to do (and caused my scalp unexpected amounts of pain). As in, my hair was down to waist. However, Friday I was super nauseous and spent all day in bed trying to move as little as possible, and to entertain myself spent at least 6 hours (no joke) unbraiding each braid one by one.
-Undecided: I found out yesterday that one of Joseph Kony’s many children is named George Bush because Kony and our former prez are “close friends”
-Happy/sad: 2 weeks from today I will be somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean on my way home. Mostly I am pretty ready to go home. There’s a small part of me though that could really be happy just staying here for an indefinite amount of time. It’s definitely too early to get nostalgic though so I’m going to stop here.